Adele’s new album 25 aka“Songs for Euthanasia” is breaking records and is the record of choice for those who were contemplating to end it all.
After the whirlwind success of Adele’s previous album 21, audiences and the terminally depressed were anxious for the follow up. Well, we’re happy to report that the golden voice of misery hasn’t disappointed.
While the prior album with its consistent theme of despair, obsession, and stalking was a soundtrack to most hipster men and women along with despondent single parents, the songs on 25 escalate those songs to a veritable anthem. Tracks such as Water Under the Bridge and Send My Love (To Your New Lover) continue her themes of never letting go while the opening single, Hello takes obsessive behavior to new heights.
All this spells success to Adele and her album sales. While it has been widely reported that the album has broken all sorts of sales records, a little known fact has begun to surface. Twelve hanging victims have been found with their Ipods playing the new album in a continual loop.
“Hello, I’m hanging here waiting for you…”
Dr. Bernard Glopf of the Maryland Institute of non-sensical studies stated: “Well, in my professional opinion the individuals who unfortunately decided to end their lives did so after listening to Adele’s songs of frustration and longing. It has obviously been brought upon by the terrible feelings of racism, sexism, and oppression that is so prevalent in our society today. Hopefully, with the action on climate change other individuals can be filled with hope rather than the despair they feel now.”
While it may seem sad for those people, it all spells another success for Adele, who is the reigning queen of Euthansia Pop.
